Let me start this out by saying my one goal here is to try and make Hart Hanson guffaw. For it was he who asked the question “What does all this mean?” when he read the news that his hit Fox series Bones had been ranked as the number 2 most searched show on Google in 2009 and it is I who have a fairly intricate knowledge of the big G and can answer that question with a series of accurate statistics, real time data, and just the right amount of sarcasm.
I’m not going to explain what Google is to all of you. You should all know. You are all not my mother who recently exclaimed that she can’t be on eBay because she doesn’t have a pen pal account. We all know that Google…is essentially kind of like the other big G: an omnipotent being with the answers to every question from “where can I find discount orangutans” to “what is the meaning of life?” And seeing how Google indexes websites from all across the web, if you’ve come here looking for the answers to either of those two questions, I got nothing on the first one and as far as the second one is concerned, I’ve been working on it and I’m fairly certain it involves string cheese. I’ll get back to you, but back to the topic at hand.
Bones is the 2nd most googled TV show. What does this mean?
Well, in short it means people are going to Google and typing in Bones. According to the popular keyword research program, Google Adwords (an intense highly mathematical algorithmic program created by the big G to determine popular keywords for advertising purposes) approximately 6.12 million people type the word bones into google every month. Now don’t get all excited just yet, because of those 6.12 million people, many of them are probably college students who are just laughing at the word "bones" or old people who don't quite get "the google" and are looking for information about osteoporosis.
I know it’s brazen to think that that many people are amused college students but aside from napping and playing Farmville on Facebook, they really don’t have that much going on. However, if we refine our search just a tad, we can see that the keyword "bones tv show" yields a monthly search volume (henceforth known as MSV, I’m lazy) of approximately 74,000 (note: October rendered 110K). Looking at that statistic we’re working with approximately 888K per year, which is fairly impressive but it certainly doesn’t warrant #2 status when it comes to the big G. What about the keyword "bones tv series"? That results in a MSV of 14,800. And if you look at the keyword “bones season” the MSV is 368,000.
You see, Google has an algorithmic process that’s akin to being inside Zack’s head. It can figure out numbers and data the likes of which mere mortals such as I can only imagine. They’ve taken all the data from various keywords and compiled them to find out that people all over the US are searching for information on Bones, the tv show.
So what does it all mean? It means they like you. They really like you. They want to spend their free time looking up information about you instead of doing things like that marketing report or their homework. And just for funsies, here’s some more fun data from adwords:
3 Most Googled Bones Episodes:
The Pain in the Heart
The Hero in the Hold
Yanks in the UK.
“Booth Bones” has approximately double the search volume than “Booth Brennan”.
Oh, and in case you were wondering Mr. Hanson, you have an approximate MSV of 1,600. Hart Hanson twitter results in a MSV of only 260, but I liken that to the majority of the world being like my mother who doesn’t understand what “tweeter” is.
Yes, Hart Hanson or Fox could have paid people in suits many dollars to figure out this information for them and their pie charts would be far prettier than mine. But I did it myself because this is marginally work related since I am talking about TV and because just like millions upon millions of other people, I like you. I really really like you.
And as far as payment is concerned, I need none. This was simply a testament to being, as Adam West would put it, “a true Boner.”